


The Sea Separates Land Not Souls

by takastucci_sen



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Siren!Hide, human!Kaneki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-25
Updated: 2016-05-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 08:49:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6651055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/takastucci_sen/pseuds/takastucci_sen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When he saw that black haired boy for the first time, he couldn't take his eyes off of him. Perhaps it was how he always was frowning, or the darker marks on his pale skin, but he knew from the start that he wanted nothing more than to see him smile.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The first time he saw the black haired boy was after a long storm. 

It didn't affect him to much, and usually he could care less about the humans it affected. There wasn’t that much destruction, as far as he could tell, but it was after the storm that the boy was on his beach. 

Not many humans would come near the waters where he lived, in fear of what could happen to them. Most humans that went the beach at the wrong time would end up drowning, bodies usually found with huge chunks missing, and as a result, it was advised for the people living around to not come near the beach. 

Except for that black haired boy. 

This boy was different; he could tell that from the start. Humans usually carried themselves in such a way that had always irked him. Maybe it was because they felt like they owned everything, or maybe because they were needlessly cruel to each other. Whatever they did really.   
Most of them deserved the fate that he gave them. 

Unlike the other humans he’s seen, this boy moved slower, almost sluggishly, and his face was down. It was different, in an interesting way. It wasn't long before he found himself watching the boy from behind a rock with entranced eyes. He was younger than he initially thought, looking around his age. From underwater, he looked the same as any other black haired human. He couldn't see his eyes still, as they were still pointed down into…something. He's seen others with them before, but never learned what they were called. 

The boy’s feet were close to the shoreline, water occasionally rushing through his little feet fingers. He moved from behind the rock, not enough that the boy would see him, but enough to get a better look at him.   
He still couldn't see eyes, but he could see marks on the pale, soft skin. Bruises? Is that what they were?   
He tried to ignore them for the time being. 

He laid his head down on the rock, trying his best to get comfortable. This human was interesting, but he couldn’t quite pinpoint why. He was gloomy, dark even, but it was different, Different enough for him to keep him around, even if for the time being.

Watching the boy almost put him in a trance, which was funny, considering that’s what he usually did to humans. The calm sea and the sound of waves crashing against the shore was quite calming, along with the boy’s gentle breathing and occasional sneeze. Sometimes he would look out to the sea, but he would make sure to hide himself if that happened. It was a good type of peace; the type that he had relished more than a good meal. The type he didn’t want to break. 

It was when he almost fell asleep when the boy got up from his spot on the shoreline, his clothes now wet from the tide. 

A frown formed on his face, knowing the boy would be leaving. Part of him wanted to charm him into staying longer, but he knew that he could easily go too far. With a huff, he watched the boy leave.  
He knew he wanted to see him again, he just didn’t know when or how.

\-----

It was a few months later when he saw the boy again. As expected, he looked older, but still carried himself in the same way. He still looked the same in a sense, same black hair, same thing in his hands (a book, he knew that now), and the bruises that marked his soft, pale skin. 

He wondered how he got them. He knew humans were clumsy, since they were able to trip over their legs, but that didn’t explain how they were on his arms and chest.   
A small part of him didn’t want to know. 

The boy sat down on the sand in the same spot he had last time and looked out to the sea. Searching for something, at least, that’s what it looked like from his point of view. He almost wanted to meet his gaze, but that would be dangerous. Interesting or not, he was still a human. Humans were bad after all, that’s what he was always taught, and that’s what he had always seen. One slightly different one wouldn’t change that, would it?

He sighed and shook the thought off. This human was different, so he didn’t have to die like the other ones. Maybe it was a weird kind of selfish, since he had to eat eventually, but no one ever said it had to be this human. He smiled and affirmed the thought, and held onto the rock, watching the boy read. 

 

\------

 

He began to see the boy more frequently, almost everyday. He noticed that he read out loud a lot more, and in return he learned the human’s language better. The most he knew if from what his mother had taught him, but there were more words and phrases then he could have ever expected. He liked it, it was much easier than their language and it was more fun to speak. Of course he would practice when the boy left, but it wasn’t long before he was pretty fluent.   
If he could, maybe one day he could talk to the boy. 

He also finds out how strange human healing is. One day the bruises would have cleared up, but on another, they’d be back. Part of him wants to follow the feeling in his stomach and swim to the boy and comfort him, but that would be too risky. Even if he didn’t want to hurt this boy, the boy could have always wanted to hurt him. 

But swimming closer to him wouldn’t be too bad, right? Not too close, but enough to at least see him better. That was perfectly fine. Humming to him to get rid of the gloom all around him wouldn’t be that bad either. 

So he swam closer, humming quietly, trying not to be loud enough to lure him. Soon the humming became full singing, as he couldn't really help himself. He hated seeing that boy frown and was hopeful that his song would make him smile. It seemed to work, as the boy sat up from his spot and a small smile grew on his face. The other smiled brightly in return, waving his tail in happiness. 

The smile may have been small but it was beautiful, like a rare gem or a priceless piece of art. Something that he wanted to him to keep forever. 

So he sang louder, trying to let the song fill the boy with something he wanted to see so badly. He didn't know why, but he wanted that boy to smile brightly, to forget all of his pain. 

Despite how loudly he sang, the boy never moved from his spot on the sand. Not blindly following his voice until he drowned. Instead he listened with that beautiful smile. 

The moment passed and his song ended leaving the black haired boy with a smile that brightened his entire world. He looked out to the sea, searching, then stopped and spoke. 

“Please sing more, I'd love to hear it.”

That filled the other with a new kind of joy. He brightly smiled and nodded, but then realized the boy couldn't see it. So he spoke back. 

“I will!”

And he did. 

\----

The boy’s visits eventually became a routine. For awhile, he would read out loud to him and talk to him about what he read. It was interesting for the most part, seeing how humans interpreted his kind. 

Other times the boy would openly talk to him, usually about his day or other small things. That was also how he learned the boy’s name, Kaneki Ken. It was a nice name. Flowing easily off of his tongue, that was slowly getting more used to his language. 

After Kaneki talked, he would sing to him.   
He wasn't completely confident with his use of the humans language but he knew how to thank Kaneki any time he complimented him. 

He still didn't show his face though. As much as he liked Kaneki, trusting him enough to see him was something he wasn't completely ready for. Not because he thought Kaneki would tell, it was because he might get scared and stop visiting, and that was the last thing he wanted. 

For now he was just the voice that occasionally sang to him, and that was perfectly fine. 

Well, almost. He sometimes wishes that he could get close enough to him to hug him the days he felt really gloomy or for him to look at him the way he does. 

But it didn't matter that much to him, after all, he liked him enough to keep him around and sing to him. And that was fine with him.   
\----

Then came that day. It was after a storm, not too big, but there was definitely some damage. Kaneki didn't visit the day after like he had anticipated, in fact he didn't come that entire week. When he did eventually come, it wasn't with a book. 

He didn't speak or move, he just looked blankly out into the sea. 

Then he cried. 

It wasn't like anything he had heard before. Not once had he heard a human so…broken. And more than anything he wanted to dart up to the shore and hug the boy until all of the pain melted away. But he couldn't, he knew he couldn't. If Kaneki found him out, he'd leave, and he didn't want that. So he watched him cry, his chest aching more with each wail. 

When the clouds began to separate, he sang in response, just as sadly as Kaneki's cries. But it was then the crying stopped, and like anytime before, Kaneki listened. He listened to his way of saying “I want to help you” and “I want you to be happy”. He listened to his way of apologizing for not being able to do anything. He listened to his way of expressing his guilt of hiding himself from him so that he wouldn't leave.   
And it hurt so much. 

When the song was over, Kaneki simply stared at the rock where he had hid himself and gave a shaky smile. He wiped the tears from his eyes and sat up from his spot. With a lighter chest he muttered two words that he needed more than anything. 

“Thank you.”

It was then that the siren had decided that he wanted nothing more than to make Kaneki Ken happy.


	2. Chapter 2

He saw Kaneki everyday after that, growing older. His hair got longer, he got taller, and the roundness in his cheeks started to leave, and in his opinion, he became more beautiful. There were less bruises on his skin,either that or his skin was healing them off. It was hard to tell from where he was. 

Kaneki became more talkative, too, and it was during those times he could have a conversation with him. The siren didn’t say too much about himself, he didn’t even give the human his name, so he was just addressed as “Voice”. It never bothered him, in fact he liked that he could call him something.

 

They would speak for hours, mostly Kaneki telling him more about himself. He spoke more about school, his home, his mother. 

Kaneki always spoke fondly of her. He spoke about how kind she was to him. How he taught him to read, and makes him his favorite food. How much she loved him and everything she did for him. 

It made his skin crawl. 

He couldn't quite pinpoint why, but something heavy stirred inside of him every time Kaneki spoke of his mother. He couldn't really describe the feeling more than a weird sickness. He didn't like it. 

But he ignored the feeling, putting a smile on his face and listened to the sound of Kaneki’s soft voice from behind that rock.

He was enchanting, really. Every little thing about him. The siren could go on for hours about what was so intriguing about that little human. They way his black hair would move, his soft grey eyes, how smooth his skin looked and how badly he wanted to touch it. But if he had choose a favorite thing, it would be his voice. 

He had heard humans talking before, and when he was younger it was really hard to listen to, as he didn’t know their language well, but he could listen to Kaneki’s light voice forever. When he was reading, talking, laughing, it was all music to his ears. 

Perhaps it was because he was almost fluent in their language, and was able to speak to his human that it was different. He hadn’t spoke to other humans before Kaneki, or sang to any of them personally. He still didn’t know what made him so different. He liked him, he really did, and he wanted to spend a lot of his time with him. And with how things were, he could do that. 

\----  
It was a few months later on a bright day that Kaneki asked for his name. He was a bit at a lost, since a siren’s name could really only be said in their language, and it would sound like gibberish to a human. He didn't tell the boy that, of course. He simply responded with “I don't have one” 

That caught Kaneki off guard. He stared at the rock for a while with a frown and the siren felt bad for lying immediately. Kaneki seemed to be thinking about something and he tilted his head in confusion, even if the other boy couldn't see it. 

“Could I give you a name?”

The siren tilted his head for a moment. “Didn’t you name me, ‘Voice’?”

Kaneki shifted on the sand uncomfortably, “Yes but...I want to give you an actual name. ‘Voice’ doesn’t really suit you.”

He pondered what his human said. A name from him would be nice. It would make their relationship seem more personal. The thought of Kaneki calling him by something like a name made his chest warm up. Maybe he then he could feel the same way as the human did whenever he called him by name. He smiled when he made his decision. 

“All right! Give me a name!”

The smile Kaneki had on his face warmed any murkiness in his chest, and he felt his own smile widen. The boy seemed deep in thought, saying words under his breath then shaking his head. Naming was hard, apparently. It wasn’t as simple as finding a phrase and applying it to the person. The siren could understand, even if he hadn’t named anyone himself. 

Then his human spoke. 

“Is Hideyoshi good? There can be a character in it that means ‘good fortune’ depending how it’s spelled, and I think that fits you.”

Hideyoshi? The siren tried it on his tongue. It was easy to say, compared to a lot of the things he learned to say in the months Kaneki visited. Not to mention that it sounded kind of pretty to him. Not too simple, but not too dumb, perfect in a way. 

“I like it! From now on, I’m Hideyoshi.”

Kaneki smiled again, and Hideyoshi’s heart lit up again. That beautiful smile that surpassed everything else. He could stare at forever. 

He really wished Kaneki could always smile like that. 

\------

Days passed and Hideyoshi became used to the name Kaneki gave him. He felt like it brought them closer, in a weird way. Even if Kaneki hadn't seen his face, and hopefully never will, he felt a bond forming between them. He couldn’t quite describe what the bond was, but he was certain he liked it. Kaneki would speak more openly because of it, and he tried to do the say when he felt comfortable. 

Unfortunately, with the blessing of that newfound bond, came something that he had been dreading. He knew Kaneki would eventually get curious about him, it was common sense. Humans were naturally curious creatures, and even a different one like his human, didn’t stay too far from that. It might have started because he admitted to not having a name that got him curious. They had known each other for almost a year and he had been coming to visit longer than that, so it was natural he would ask him things. 

They were the hard to answer at first. Things like why he never could see him despite the fact they always talked, why he didn’t have a name or why he always spoke to him. While those questions had answers, telling Kaneki would make everything he’s worked up to useless. He could tell by whenever he talked about his kind, he would have a look of fear. It was scary. Even if human’s portrayal of his kind was false, the fact that they drowned and ate people still stood. Even if Hideyoshi would never do that to Kaneki, the fact he has done it didn’t change. 

Sirens were feared by humans, and if Kaneki knew the truth, he would never see him again. 

He wouldn’t drown him if he found out, that would hurt far too much. If anything we wanted Kaneki to live if he found him out. After everything he had done for him, it was the least he could do. 

Still he answered what he thought Kaneki deserved to know. When he asked he described his home, the sealife he saw daily, the way the water changes depending on the weather, anything he thought that would interest his human.   
When he asked about his family, Hideyoshi would tell him about what he remembers of his mother. She was wonderful, really. She knew so much about humans, and didn’t hurt them unless she had to, and advised him to do the same. 

He didn’t at first, but he was surely getting better. 

He did tell Kaneki that his mother had to leave him as soon as he was self sufficient. It brought some forgotten pain back, as his voice quivered while he said it. He hadn’t known before then how much he missed her. 

As if to return the favor for everything, Kaneki comforted him to the best of his ability. His words were kind, soft, and all around beautiful, and it brought a soft smile back to his face. Kaneki smiled as soon as he realized that any of his pain had left, which made more of the murkiness fade away.

If only he were allowed to hold him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey it's gonna be longer, who's happy about that? I can't really do multichapter, but in order to get this they way I really want it, it has to be long. K, thanks y'all :3c


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning this one's painful

Kaneki came to visit Hideyoshi the night after his mother died. He didn't say how she died, he just told him the news and sat in his usual spot, with the same demeanor he had a year ago. 

Hideyoshi felt bad for his human, that was a given. He knew what it was like to lose such an important person. He could feel the air of loneliness that surrounded Kaneki, and it hurt to see. For a while, he thought he was doing a good job keeping Kaneki happy, but losing a family member was something different entirely. He couldn't sing or talk to take away that pain. 

It doesn't stop him from trying. 

He sang to him, knowing his voice would somewhat bring his spirits up. He tried his best to let his song comfort his human, but they reflected his emotions. The song wasn't happy or cheerful like they usually were. He could tell that Kaneki felt his sadness too. Hei didn't smile, but there's a lot less gloom surrounding his face. At least his voice could still work it’s magic.   
He’ll take it. 

Kaneki gave the siren a quiet “Thank you”, before curling up and the sand and gently sobbing. The siren allowed for Kaneki to cry, staying silent. He needed to. It was obvious he was petting it up for some time. 

Just like when they first met. 

He sighed, lying down against his rock. Seeing Kaneki reset like this was awful and Hideyoshi wished he could do more. At the very least pat him on the shoulder and tell him “I’m here.”

Was it worth it? Rushing to shore to touch and comfort Kaneki only for him to scream and run away? Have Kaneki remember how much danger he was in being at that beach in the first place? Finding out that the voice that comforted him when he needed it most was a man eating siren?

No, it wasn't. 

Hideyoshi didn't know what drove him to care so much about the human, but the reason didn't matter. What matter is that he did care, he cared so much it hurt. He wanted Kaneki to like him, and keep whatever image he has of him pure. Even if he wanted nothing more than to touch his soft skin and tell him face to face that he will always be there for him. 

But he couldn't, he had to make sure Kaneki stayed ignorant of him. No matter what the cost. 

As long as the person you love most is happy. 

So he stood there, watching his human cry with a heavy heart, for the second time. Only this time, he cried too. 

\---

It wasn't for six months until Kaneki visited him again. That time without his human was agonizing. He still sang, but it didn't feel the same since no one heard it. People went by the beach, none of them were Kaneki. He found himself falling into old habits, and luring people out to sea. Weather it was just for something to do or food he didn't know.   
He was glad Kaneki couldn't see it. 

When Kaneki did eventually come around, he was more relaxed. Much more so than when they last met. Not quite happy, but not upset. For the time being, he took what he could get. 

The first thing Hideyoshi wanted to do was tell him how much he missed him, but that might freak him out. The human was always shy after all. So instead he gave a simple, “Hi Kaneki!”

Kaneki put on a smile when looking at his rock. His heart skipped a beat seeing that beautiful smile again. He probably missed that more than he initially thought. 

“Hi, Hide. I'm sorry it's been awhile.”

“Hide?”

Red appeared on Kaneki's cheeks. 

“I…thought I could call you that…if it's okay?”

Hideyoshi snickered quietly. 

“I don't mean mind! It's easy to say than the other name.”

He could tell that his human was happy to hear that, it made his heart warm up. 

He heard from one of Kaneki's books that absence made the heart grow fonder, and he could definitely say it was true. He missed Kaneki so much, seeing him again was like a blessing. 

He asked Kaneki to tell him what he's been doing for so long, and Kaneki simply said he had to move. 

“It's been hard to visit, the rules are more strict. Sorry, Hide.”

It was hard for the siren to hide the disappointment in his voice when he told his human that it was all okay. Lying was bad, he was always taught that, and he felt bad for doing it. 

Knowing Kaneki wouldn't be able to visit as often was upsetting. Part of him was telling him to be grateful that he hadn't forgotten about him, but he might. And that's what was scary, the thought of someone as beautiful as Kaneki up and forgetting him. Not even having a face to remember him by. 

That was his fault, wasn't it? 

Hide tried to shake the feeling off and to focus on his main task. He talked to his human like he usually did, pretending like nothing's really changed. As long as Kaneki was happy, he would be fine. 

That's all that mattered to him, it's all that needed to matter to him. 

Kaneki stayed longer than he used to that day, as a way to make it up to Hide for being gone for so long. It pushed away some of his worries, enough so that Kaneki hopefully couldn't tell he was upset. He dreaded the time he had to go, since unlike before he didn't know when he was coming back. He noticed as the sun began to set, his voice began to waver. 

“Kaneki, do you know when you'll be able to visit again?”

The boy stayed silent and the siren felt his heart drop to the bottom of the sea. 

“I'll try to visit when I can. I'm sorry.”

“No! Don't be! It's alright, really.”

\-----  
Days pass into months, at least seven had to have passed. Hide missed Kaneki, he missed him so much. It wasn't at all like what he felt when he was gone for those first six months. At least now he knew why he was gone, but now his mind couldn't help but think of the worst.   
Was Kaneki alright? Was he eating well? Was he doing fine without his mother? His stomach turned when he thought of Kaneki getting more bruises from wherever he was now. The last time Hide saw him, he refrained from talking about it, even when he asked. 

Is he doing fine without you?

Is that why Kaneki didn't visit anymore? Had his life finally picked itself up and he didn't need him anymore? His stomach began to ache again. 

Has he forgotten about me?

He lied down against the rock, feeling his throat close up and a sob escaped from his mouth. Time moved so quickly he hadn't noticed how long seven months really was. It was enough time for Kaneki to forget about him, considering all of the things humans did in their daily lives. Another year had passed and he only saw his beautiful human twice. 

Even if it was harder for Kaneki to visit, he had done it once. Was his new caretaker so strict as to not allow him to go to a beach, even once? They didn't know what beach he was going to, did they?

He really hoped they didn't. 

For a moment, he wished that he could go back to those first couple of years with Kaneki, back when he saw him everyday. Even if his human carried a sadder air around him, and those horrible bruises he had, he still could make him smile. He could hear his light laugh, listen to his voice as he read. 

It was horribly selfish of him to wish for something like that. 

But what if he's finally happy now?

That would make his wish even more selfish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3 chapters in, hang in there kids. these are getting shorter, sorry.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uh almost done here.

Time passed slower and slower. Days and months would trudge by and Hide’s barely able to keep track. Everyday he would look out to the shoreline, hoping Kaneki would be there, only to be disappointed. He still wondered how he was, and what was keeping him but tried not to let it get to him too much. Other than that, his life was rather boring. Was it always this boring? He didn’t know. 

  


It had been eight months since he had last seen Kaneki, and another year had passed. To say that he was happy to see the human was an understatement. He greeted him full heartedly, making sure that his smile could reach his human, even if he couldn’t see it. Kaneki smiled too, and it seemed a lot of pent up tension left him. His human hadn’t changed much, just the usual things like being taller and longer hair. 

  


As well as more bruises on his skin. 

  
  


“Hi, Hide. I’m really sorry. I’ve...been busy” He placed a hand on his chin, his smile falling. 

Kaneki had made the gesture before, and Hide had concluded it was some kind of nervous habit, his mother had always said he had one too. His human made his anytime he spoke of his family, and every time it gave him the same bad feeling. 

He knew they were hurting him, but he knew he couldn’t say that. 

  


“It’s okay! I’m just glad to see you. How’ve you been?”

  


His human tensed, uncharacteristically so. Hide felt his stomach drop as he braced himself for more of his fears coming true. 

  


“Um, fine I suppose. Just really busy. I wish I could visit more, honest.”

  


“I already told you it’s okay. It’s not like I’m going anywhere!” He said with a laugh.    
  


Kaneki’s body seemed to lose tension too, as he finally sat down and his smile returned. Was he worried that he was going to leave? The thought brought a smile to his face. It was good to know that he wasn’t the only one completely worried.

  


He asked Kaneki more questions about his life and how it had been, for the most part nothing seemed to have changed. He still loved reading and still went to school. He told him about all of the things he had been learning about, and what his plans for the future might be. 

  


“I want to go to university, but it takes a lot to get in.”

  


“I’m sure you can! You taught me a lot after all.”

  


“It’s more than giving knowlege, Hide. It takes being better than others.”

  


“It sounds tough, but I still know you can do it.”

  


The smile Kaneki gave him almost made the eight month wait worth it. 

  


For the rest of that evening Hide tried to pry about his home life. Even if it was wrong, he needed to know how Kaneki was doing. It was frustrating anytime the human dodged the question or tried to change the subject, but it also scared him. 

  


Were things really that bad?

  


“Hey Hide? Can I ask you something?”

  


“Anything. That's what I'm here for!”

  


Kaneki chuckled and asked, “Do you know why this place is so dangerous?”

  
  


The siren felt his heart drop. So his new caretakers knew about him, or at least knew the rumors. 

  


“I…don't think it's dangerous. You've been coming here for years, and nothing's tried to hurt you.”

  


Kaneki shifted uncomfortably on the sand. “I suppose so. But, if there really were a monster here, you would know, right?”

  


That stung “Yeah of course! Trust me Kaneki, nothing will hurt you.”

  


The human warmly smiled. “Thank you.”

\----

  


Weeks went on and Hide finally got to see Kaneki everyday again. He looked increasingly exhausted as days went on and the bruises seemed to have gotten darker. 

It made his blood boil. 

  


Kaneki would talk nonsense, spewing whatever he could until he would eventually doze off. Hide felt no need to wake him, after all, he seemed to have been through alot in the past couple years. His worries were all confirmed, by his human’s unconscious babble. Whoever he lived with now hurt him, and when they weren’t they left him for himself. Humans weren’t like sirens in that way, from his understanding. While a siren would need a parent for the first ten to twelve years of their lives, a human would need then for a good twenty years. 

  


His human deserved better, he really did. 

  


He sang to Kaneki as he slept, trying to calm him down any time he stirred in his sleep. He looked so peaceful lying there on the sand, unlike sort of peace he’d seen before. The moon highlighted his skin in such a way that it was captivating. Hide felt his heart racing inside of his chest. 

  


It wouldn’t hurt to get a closer look at him, he was asleep afterall. 

  


The siren found himself going from behind his rock to the more open, yet shallow water. Kaneki seemed to have been glowing in the moonlight, like a star in the white sand. He swam closer, close enough to see the clothes the human was wearing, to see how his hair curled while spread out along the ground, almost close enough to touch. The temptation was strong, unbelievably strong. How Hide wanted to stroke his cheek, or ruffle his hair. He wanted to rub the bruises as a sign of comfort, and kiss them like his mother had done to his cuts. 

  


He reached a clawed hand out, almost ready to give in, completely confident that Kaneki wouldn’t wake up. He was so close to his cheek, he could feel the warmth radiating from it. So close, so close. 

  


He coughed. 

  


Hide’s heart nearly popped out of his chest, as he quickly backed up. Bad idea, that was a really bad idea. He could be content with watching from afar, until he fell asleep. He could sing to him to, just from afar, a safe distance. 

  


\----

  


He woke up the next morning with Kaneki being gone, as he had expected. He was sure it would be a few days before he say him again too. He braced himself for more lonely days, but it didn't happen. 

  


It was late that night when he saw his human. 

  


Kaneki didn’t appear at the shoreline, he was at the edge of the bluff above the sea.

  


“No.”

  


Hide had seen others do this before, he knew what Kaneki was planning on doing. 

He stared out, tears falling from his eyes. 

  
  
  


“Kaneki, please!” He yelled. 

  


A pause. 

  


“Please don't.” He called louder. 

  


Another pause. 

  


“Please.” It was a cry. 

  
  


He could hear his human apologize before he jumped. 

  


And the siren went straight after him. 

  


His human wasn't like others, he didn't deserve to go this way. He didn't want for him to leave this way. 

  


_ “Faster, faster” _

  


He dove after Kaneki as soon as his body hit the water, reaching his hands out to try to catch him. 

  


_ “Go faster.” _

  


He was so close, he could save him. 

  


_ “You can't die here.” _

  


He grabbed on to his human’s hands and pulled him into a hug. 

  
  


\----

  


Strong arms held onto him before a warm light washed over him. He couldn’t quite describe it, but it felt homely, somehow. Even though he knew his eyes were closed, it was bright enough for him to see clearly. Then the song started. A beautiful nostalgic song played in his mind. The song that voice always sang to him when he felt at his worse. Perhaps that voice really was an angel, like he had thought throughout childhood. The angel was finally going to take him. 

  


He didn’t know if he could smile or not, but he certainly tried. He wanted to hear Hide’s voice one last time, even if he couldn’t properly say goodbye to him. 

  


He was glad he got the chance.

  


The angel pulled him up, faster and faster, as his senses began to cloud. The song began to become hazy, and he couldn’t tell if the angel was going extremely fast or slow, but he knew one thing. 

  


It was over. It was finally over.

  
  
  
  


_ “Stay with me.” _

  


That voice. 

  


_ “I’ve got you, hold on a little longer.” _

  


The voice that always brightened his life.

  


_ “You’ll be alright, just stay with me.” _

  


He wanted to speak but realized he couldn’t. Instead he opened his eyes. 

  


That bright golden light, blond hair and an orange tail. 

  


_ “I’m here. Don’t worry, I’m here.” _

  


Kaneki smiled as the light washed over him. 

  
“I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick note  
>  Kaneki got in a lot of trouble when he went home after he stayed at the beach, sorry if I didn't imply that well enough.
> 
> We're nearing the end, bare with me a little longer.


	5. Chapter 5

 

Hide brought Kaneki close to him as a feeble attempt to keep water from getting into his lungs, saying words to calm himself down. He was hoping he was still holding his breath so his job would be a bit easier. He had to get him to the surface fast, any longer underwater and he would drown. The siren gulped, pressing the human’s head to his chest and gently stroked his black hair. 

 

“You’ll be okay. I’ll get you up there soon.”

 

Kaneki’s expression seemed strangely at peace; it was scary. Had he really wanted to die this much, despite everything? Hide almost felt bad, seeing how death was obviously his human’s salvation. Was it selfish to want him to live? Possibly, but he knew this wasn’t the answer. He could show him that by saving him. It’s the most he could really do.

 

“You didn’t want this, did you?”

 

He saw that brief hesitation before Kaneki jumped, he knew that this wasn’t fully want he wanted. Maybe he was pushed to a point that he felt he didn’t have a choice. Had the boy really been that lonely? Would he have been able to do anything? After all, he  _ was _ just a voice to the human. He had needed someone to be there for him, a human, a person who could stay by his side. All he ever could do was watch from afar, not knowing what was happening to him. 

 

Maybe this was his fault. 

 

The breached the surface without a hitch and Hide quickly realized that the exhaustion was catching up to him, but he couldn’t rest now, not in the middle of the sea where Kaneki could fall and all of his effort would’ve been for nothing. He gulped nervously, his thoughts conflicting. His mind reminded him of the chance that he was interrupting Kaneki’s salvation by being selfish, but the other part was saying that he could finally help his human the way he deserves.  

 

The latter option won him over.

 

Holding the human closer to his chest, Hide darted to shore, pushing his exhaustion to the back of his mind. The only sounds were Kaneki’s heartbeat and the sound of his tail moving through the water. He motivated himself with what could come next. He could finally help Kaneki, he could finally be there for him, they could finally be together. Maybe Kaneki would accept him for what he is. 

 

A smile grew on Hide’s face when he felt the water become more shallow, and the feeling of triumph filled his chest.  He waded closer to the shoreline, and pulled himself onto the sand. He had done it, his human was safe. It took him a few moments to register the fact that Kaneki was still in his arms. His breaths were quick and hasty, finally catching up to him. He was alive, and he would live. 

  
  


Exhaustion finally caught up to him. He had never done anything like that previously, so it was expected for it to be taxing. He didn’t stop himself from lying down next to Kaneki, just listening to the waves behind them crash against the shoreline. His eyelids felt heavy, too heavy too keep up. Far heavier than Kaneki’s body. Sleep didn’t sound that bad, as long as it wasn’t for too long. He at least wanted to be out of Kaneki’s sight before he woke up. As much as he loved Kaneki, he didn’t want him to find out yet, even if he knew he would accept him. His reaction of anger and fear would come first, and that’s what was scary. 

 

He found himself reaching a hand to grab Kaneki’s. He didn’t want to worry about that yet. 

\----

 

The light seemed to have faded away as Kaneki felt consciousness return to him. Before he could fully take a breath, he coughed and they quickly became a hacking fit. The coughs hurt, getting all of the water out of his throat wasn’t easy, and it took a bit before he could breath again. His body was heavy, heavy and exhausted. His mind was completely fuzzy too. Was he in heaven? Did he actually die?

 

His surroundings became more clear, and he could now see white sand surrounding him, and smell the ocean. The moon was high in the sky, illuminating the sea in front of him. It was beautiful, almost like his own depiction of heaven. But that couldn’t be true. Everything was starting to feel real again. From the slight breeze to the strange warmth next to him.

 

Of course. He was on the shore. So he hadn’t died yet, something saved him.

 

Realization washed through him as he sprang up, continuing to cough seawater out of his system. He was saved, back on land without a scratch. He wasn’t on the ocean floor, and some type of beast wasn’t eating him like he was told by his aunt. He was alive. Completely alive. 

 

His heart swelled up with emotion as he felt tears stream down his face. Something in the water had saved him, or type of angel had. He remembered that voice that spoke to him as he fell, asking him to hold on. He knew that was his Voice. Had that voice actually saved him? 

 

It was during that thought when Kaneki finally registered that his left hand was being held down by something. He turned around to see what seemed to be a sleeping person holding his hand. Except the person had claws and scales on his hands, and more scales covered his shoulders and neck, like freckles. Then he saw the blond hair sprawled along the sand, and the bright orange tail that was where the person’s legs would be. 

 

Kaneki almost screamed, unable to believe his eyes. A part of him was certain that he really was dead, and the...thing he was seeing was some type of afterlife creature, but why would he look so human? If it weren’t for the tail, scales, and claws, he’d look normal, and he was certain that demons were much more monstrous. In fact, it was very beautiful. 

 

Kaneki pressed his free hand on the creature’s face, trying to wake it up. If it hadn’t eaten him yet, he was certain he wouldn’t, nothing here would hurt him after all. He swallowed his fear and hoped for the best when the creature started to stir. If he was eaten, so be it, he supposed. 

 

The creature slowly opened his eyes, an obvious grogginess surrounded him. It was almost cute, in a way. It’s eyes were a soft golden brown, that weren’t threatening in the slightest. Kaneki felt his guard lower as he tried to find the courage to smile, but that was quickly gone. The creature’s once tired eyes were filled with fear, but not the same type of fear that a scared animal would have. It was something else entirely, but he couldn’t tell what. 

 

It began to back up and get closer to the sea, it’s eyes beginning to water. Was it scared Kaneki would hurt it? He reached his hand out, trying to reach out to it, but it made a screeching sound in response. Not loud enough to hurt, but enough to cause him to flinch. He snapped out of it as fast as he could and tried to grab the creature’s hand again.

 

It stopped moving.

 

“I-I…”   
  


That voice. It was…

 

The creature began shivering, and tried to make itself seem smaller. 

 

“You...weren’t supposed to see me yet...”

 

Tears ran down it’s cheeks as it tried to keep backing up.

 

“You weren’t supposed to wake up yet...I should’ve have fallen asleep...I’m so sorry.”   
  


Kaneki was in shock, but it clicked. The creature knew him, and it’s voice was the most precious thing in the world to him. This creature was his Voice. 

 

“Hi-Hide?”

 

The creature tried to wipe away his tears and gave the human a shaky, but bright smile. 

 

The realization hit unbelievably hard. 

 

This creature was his Voice. The “beast” of the sea was his Voice. The same Voice who he spent his childhood talking to. The Voice that sang to him, talked to him, laughed with him. The only friend he really ever had, and could finally see. The Voice that had saved his life, because he knew above everyone it was worth saving. 

 

Kaneki didn’t stop the tears from coming. He didn’t stop himself from throwing his arms around the siren in a long awaited hug, and he didn’t complain when he felt scaly arms wrap around him in return. He just sat there, holding his most precious person and crying.

 

He felt Hide pull him close to his chest and rubbed his back, singing something. He didn’t understand the words, but he knew the song, and he knew it well. It was what Hide sang anytime he felt like he was at his worst. What he sang as his way to show affection. 

  
The song that meant  _ “I’m here, I won’t leave, and I love you.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact: this ending was thought of before I had a story  
> Funner Fact: this was actually the hardest chapter for me to write 
> 
> One more chapter kiddos.


	6. Chapter 6

 

Hide didn’t quite know how long he held Kaneki there for. He had gotten lost in his song, and Kaneki’s soft sobs that slowly quieted. His human was completely silent, some point, he hadn’t realized when until he just felt him nuzzling into his chest. It was surreal in a sense, finally holding Kaneki in his arms and doing what he had always wanted to do. Almost too good to be true, but he knew he would never dream of Kaneki killing himself, even if this were the outcome. 

 

He smiled as his song finally ended, and he gently pushed Kaneki away from his chest. Kaneki returned the smile, his face still wet from crying. He seemed to have been suppressing a laugh too, before it came out. 

 

“It’s strange really, I never would’ve thought for you to be so beautiful.”

 

Heat rushed to Hide’s cheeks and Kaneki’s too. 

 

“B-beautiful?”

 

“I-I mean, in books they always described sirens as being ugly fishlike people, but you don’t look anything like that.”

 

Hide chuckled lightly at the boy’s comment. Kaneki had read something to him about sirens once, a long time ago. Something about how they looked more like eels with human faces. He seemed so scared back then, and had even said he hoped it wasn’t true. His smile grew at the memory.

 

“I guess humans make things up so people wouldn’t avidly seek us out. We like to stay hidden.”

 

“Obviously.” 

 

The boy added that with a smirk that Hide was sure he had never seen before. Had he gotten that during the couple years they didn’t see each other? Kaneki began to laugh, presumably at his shocked expression. He couldn’t help but laugh with him. 

 

“But can I ask, why stay hidden? People seem to fear sirens more than they want to hurt them.”

 

The siren frowned and brought his tail in. What was the best way to word this? 

 

“I guess I didn’t want for you to be scared of me. It was kinda nice to have someone who didn’t know about me to talk to. I’m the only siren at this beach, and it gets pretty lonely. My mom always said I was like a bunny. That’s what they’re called, right?”   
  


“Bunnies dying when they get lonely is a myth. But I guess I understand, It must be pretty lonely out here. Can’t you talk to the fish?” He looked out into the sea. 

 

Hide laughed quietly. “That’s a myth too. Our language is like a human language, animals can’t exactly understand. We can’t understand them either. Though having something as a pet would be kinda fun.”

 

Kaneki’s smile returned. “Have you ever tried, it could ease a bit of your loneliness.”

 

“I don’t know how long something would stick around. They have things to do, you know?”

 

“Like swim around all day?”

 

“Yep!”

 

The boy began to laugh again. “So what other things are myths?”   
  


Hide looked back to all of the books Kaneki had read to him. There was a lot, and Kaneki was so ready to learn. He smiled, this would be fun. 

 

“Well for starters, we can control people. I’ve never done it, but it’s meant to be for self defence. Secondly, we can grow legs, but I don’t think I can yet. I guess it’s a coming of age sort of thing. I just know you would turn back whenever you get wet.  We can’t turn other people into sirens, we can’t make people immortal, we aren’t immortal. Our life span is about the same as a human’s, if not a little longer. We can also do cool things with our voices, and actually use them as weapons. I wanna try at some point.” He paused for a moment and let Kaneki take all of the information in. 

 

“That’s a lot.”

 

“I guess you can say I’m kind of amazing.”

 

“No, I think books build you up to be more than you are.”   
  


Hide made a small noise in shock. “I’m hurt.”

 

Kaneki laughed, and Hide realized it was the most he had ever heard him laugh. Even after knowing the boy for years, and pretty much growing up with him. He couldn’t help but smile brightly, almost feeling accomplished. Despite everything, he at least got to see him smile from up close, and hear his laugh. 

 

Kaneki wasn’t scared either, he was curious, but that couldn’t really be helpped. He didn’t mind the questions he continued to ask either, it felt like they were finally bonding properly. He didn’t need to hold back or keep secrets. That was okay, all of it was okay. 

 

\-----

 

“Kaneki?”

 

“Yes?”   
  


“Where do you plan on going from here?”

 

The question made Kaneki tense up. Honestly, he didn’t know either. By all accounts, he wasn’t supposed to even be alive right now. His plan was for the siren to eat him once he drowned, but here that siren was, talking to him. He had almost forgotten why he was there before Hide had asked. They had been talking about other things for so long, that he knew that it would be brought up eventually. He sighed, bringing his knees to his chest. 

 

“I’m not sure, I can’t go home. Not after what happened. I wish I could stay here, but I wouldn’t have anywhere else to go. I don’t really have much of a choice.”

 

He saw Hide’s face melt into a frown. It was reassuring that he cared so much, even if Kaneki knew he couldn’t do really anything about it. His home life was for him to endure, not for Hide to take for him. Hide had done a lot for him in the past few years with how things were, and it would be selfish for him to ask anything more. 

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I know apologizing doesn’t really do anything, but it’s something right?”

 

“Hide…”

 

“You may not believe this, but you’ve done a lot for me. So the it’s the least I can do.”

 

“Me? Hide, all I’ve done is make you worried to the point you go out of your way to save me. If anything I’m just a burde-”

 

“No. You aren’t.” He hadn’t once heard Hide use that tone. It wasn’t angry, but still was backed with some type of aggravation that made him jump. Hide looked at him in the eye, almost piercing through his skull with his golden brown gaze. Kaneki felt his heart sink.

 

“I told you before Kaneki, I never showed myself to you because I was scared of you leaving. I value you enough to go against my nature to keep you company and to even save you. I don’t know what it was at first anymore, but I see you as something that I can’t ever lose.” He paused for a moment, and blinked out the tears forming in his eyes. “I could never see someone like you as a burden. So please never say that again.”

 

Kaneki sat in silence, still looking into the siren’s watering eyes. He hadn’t thought about it until then. Hide had always been very unearthly to him. Someone or something that was too good to be real. Someone who cared and loved him as much as he did, who stuck around even when life got too hard for him to handle. Maybe it was because Hide wasn’t human that he was this way. 

 

But did that really matter? He was still Hide. 

 

He scooted closer to the siren and set his head on his scaley shoulder, looking out into the sea. 

 

“I won’t. I’m sorry.”

 

The sun was rising. It turned the once dark ocean into a soft orange, and the clouds in the sky to many shades of pink and orange. The sunlight brought color to Hide’s tail, making it somehow brighter. A good type of bright, one that he knew he could bask in, much like the actual sun. 

 

“How pretty. I never wake up early enough to see it.”

 

A smile formed on Kaneki’s face. “Yeah it is.”

 

“Hey, Kaneki?”

 

“Yes Hide?”

 

“If things work out well enough, can you visit later today?”

 

The smile only grew. 

 

“Of course.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so ends this story. I thank you all for reading. It means a lot.

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah this is a thing. Thanks @mamachika-nagachika on tumblr for the help.


End file.
